Divorce is never an easy subject to talk about it. It’s usually a heartbreaking time for all involved and can be a minefield to negotiate.
A lot of people don’t even know where to start when it comes to getting a divorce.
You can get one without involving solicitors but personally, I’d be far too nervous about incorrectly filling in a form that has to be sent to the court!
I think these should things should be handled by the professionals.
Grounds for divorce
Before you begin, you need to decide the grounds you’re going to base your divorce on. In England and Wales (laws are different in Scotland and Northern Ireland) you can give one of 5 reasons for getting divorced:
- Adultery – This only counts if the person your husband/wife has had sex with is of the opposite sex; even if you’re in a same-sex marriage.
- Unreasonable behaviour – for example, violent or verbal abuse.
- You have lived apart for more than 2 years
- You have lived apart for more than 5 years – even if your husband/wife refuses to get divorced, this is usually enough for it to be granted.
Starting the proceedings
Once you’ve decided on the grounds, you will need to file the forms with the courts. Here’s where I’d let the professionals do the work.
A good law firm will make this very sad and stressful process much easier.
Once proceedings have begun, your husband/wife will be sent a divorce petition.
If both parties agree to get divorced, you won’t usually have to attend court. Your solicitors will sort all the paperwork for you and the court will make a decision based on the paperwork.
Some people celebrate their divorce!
For some people, getting divorced is a cause for celebration and they even have cakes especially for the occasion! Thankfully, I’m still really happy with the super wonderful husband and (hopefully!) he’s still happy with me so I don’t need a cake but some of them are quite funny!
I think my favourite would have to be the one that says:
I used to be married but I’m better now!
The super wonderful husband said he’d never divorce me because he can’t be bothered to fill in all the forms. He hates forms! Shhh, don’t tell them there are people out there who’ll fill them all in for you!
I’m not going to rest on my laurels though because if you look at the infographic below, it says you’re more likely to get divorced in your 40s (I’ve just turned 40!) and the average length of a marriage before divorce in the UK is 11.7 years.
We’ve not long celebrated our 11th wedding anniversary!
One of the statistics I do like on the infographic though is the one that says the more expensive the wedding, the more likely a couple is to divorce. We got married as cheaply as we possibly could so that bodes well for us!
In 2012 there were 118,140 divorces in the UK and almost half of them were in the first 10 years of marriage. I must say, I was relieved when we celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary as it meant we’d made it through the 7-year itch!